Being A Man

Being A Man

I remember the first time I cried

I was with one of my girlfriends

A girl who was my friend “girlfriend”

She was like can you cry?

It’s not only her reaction

I saw most of the people giving an unusual reacting

When they saw men crying

Just to inform

We are also made of the same organic matter

that you are made of.

We are Men, not the Ironmen

Even ironmen have cried

To the one who says men don’t cry

Just know

Blood flows through our veins, not the Aspirin

In the middle of the night

Covered me with a blanket

Wetting my pillow

Holding my voice

I cry

I cry for having a bad day

I cry for being ignored

I cry for every small thing I lost

I cry for not having my favorite food at lunch

I cry for not getting that one call that I waited for

I cry for being ignored by that one person

It’s how my half of the night is passed

Then I wake up

With a smile on my face.

I cry at night when I’m alone

That doesn’t mean I’m afraid of crying in front of people

It’s just I don’t want to shed my tears in front

The one who can’t understand it

It’s not just the tears that come out

of eyes when one cries

it’s their emotions

the emotions that heart can’t hold on to more

the emotions about which the mind can’t think anymore.

So, please

Sop saying that man don’t cry

Tears aren’t the indication to decide gender.

Besides no one is born with a smile on their face

We all are born with a crying face! mostly

I’m judged for almost everything I do

If I cry my manhood is questioned.

If I treat women with chivalry,

I will be called as desperate

If I do things without asking(discussing) I’m selfish

If I deny doing anything I’m not interested.

For me Being good

Is

Being suffocating.

People can't see you the way you see yourself

And you can't see yourself the way people see you.

Having a smile on your face doesn't mean you are happy.

Doing things on time doesn't mean you are fine

 

Stuck in the riddle soo called the life

Darkness, hopelessness, and loneliness being my best friends

Making me feel paralyzingly numb

It's not easy to explain

What's going on in my brain.

Never want to open my eyes in the morning but one second

Can you sleep in every past night?

Sleep being my enemy

Which doesn't come to me

Giving me the scars that don't bleed

My nights are passed

In long talks with myself

About how things should have been

But couldn't be

 Then There comes the morning

Rushing to start the day

Should I wear a shirt or a t-shirt?

The red one or the black

What people will think

And the day passes in thinking thinking and thinking

At last, no one cares

People are least worried about the way they hurt you

The only thing they point it is the way you react to it..

You can break up if it's a relationship and move on

But how to move on from these thoughts, feelings, emotions?